Real body dysphoria, how do I handle getting old?

MaidenMotherCrone

I figure it be appropriate to discuss real body dysphoria and not a man's delusion that he's a woman. I don't know the average age group here, but I am middled aged and a second wave feminist. I turned 50 this year and had a lot to reflect on, from my accomplishments and where I am with my family. I'm the head of household; married to a man whom I love dearly and has supported me without thinking about himself. I have a 16 year old daughter and an 8 year old son. My mother always told me that her 50s were the best decade of her life, I don't see it. My mother died at 92 back in 2022 and it was scary just seeing her deteriorate for several years.

I know it's weird to obsess over this, but I used to be a gymnast and a runner; I miss being young and having all the energy in the world. I have fond memories of being in high school, hitting the tennis court and dominating all the girls and some of the boys, I took great pride in being sporty. I would run 4 miles before getting on the bus at 6am with no issue; now I can hardly get out of bed and I'm in shape. While I'm still in shape and stronger than the average woman my age, I don't feel 100% and it frustrates me. I'm still stronger than my daughter, but she is catching up. I am happy my daughter is following my footsteps, she's really into hockey and I've been paying for her junior league games since she turned 12.

I just hate looking in the mirror, knowing I'm not "me" anymore. I will even settle for being 30 again, back when I felt like I reached my peak and I could do whatever I want.

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